San Mateo High School

Our son attended EDS from K through grade 5. Lower grades were mostly a positive, nurturing experience for our son. But once 4th grade and preteen issues started coming up, it became clear that it’s only a good school for neurotypical kids who are into sports, but not for kids who don’t fit that mold. Small class sizes, supportive teachers, friendly community and fun events are plusses. But the curriculum is inconsistent, there’s a high turnover rate, and an appearance driven culture. Lots of talk about diversity, community, SEL but mostly displayed with performative events, not curriculum or genuine fellowship. Changes in administration (we had three school directors while there) went from “We’ll do whatever is necessary to support him” to “No, if we do that for him, we have to do it for everyone” (and everyone could have benefitted). With mild ASD, all our son needed was accommodations for field trips, a sensory space to take breaks and most importantly explicit SEL for all the students about teasing and bullying all the way through middle school. With a high tuition, large administration and “close community” we thought we could expect those things, but we couldn’t. Even the social connections we and our son made during six years at EDS all dissipated once our son had a hard time with the social demands of his tween “friends”, and bullying and teasing ensued. He was not the first to experience this in middle school there, and we’re sadly confident not the last. Reaching out to fellow parents for support was met with dismissal or anger. The school and its community is not what it used to be, nor what we hoped it would be for the duration.