Hi, and congrats on your job relo! Not sure if you are already here in the bay area, but I hold a monthly Marin Seminar, that would help you figure out exactly what you are looking for:
In it I go over Marin neighborhoods, commute times, weather patters (YES it does matter where you live if you want summer sun). Some parts of SR (even though they are further North) might be a quicker commute than San Anselmo. It all depends where you are commuting to, and what time of the day. I'd be more than happy to talk to you on the phone or Skype if you aren't yet here and I can give you a good overview of towns, prices and such.
So many neighborhoods offer exactly what you are looking for (community, great schools, and more). On my street we just had our annual block party this weekend, and it just reinforces to me how much I love our sense of community and friendships with my neighbors.
You may also want to get set up on a home search alert using CleanOffer.com, which is tied directly into our MLS system. Here is the link to set up your search (you have to know an agent in order to get access to CleanOffer):
I have young children myself, so have a good pulse into Marin Schools.
Feel free to call/email/text any time!
#1 Agent McGuire Marin County