You may be able to use other trains in addition to the "F" If you are in Williamsburg or Greenpoint for example, Start with the "L" towards Manhattan and if you take that to 14th Street and 6th Avenue, you can get the "F". You can also take the "L" directly to the last stop 8th Ave and walk or change trains from there. If Living in Greenpoint, you would get the "G" 2 stops, towards Queens and then pick up the "F" train.
Your husband would have to go into Penn Station for the LIRR. He would take the same trains I described above. He can also transfer to the E and others. Your ride to you location of employment would be about
20 23 minutes. His ride to Penn Station about the same, 25 28 minutes.
You could come into the Williamsburg and Greenpoint area and take the actual ride to your destinations just to see for yourself how long it would take. The time frame I gave you is if you are getting on the L at either Bedford, Lorimer or Graham. These are the 1st 2nd and 3rd stops from and to NYC. If "G" train it would be the Nassau or Greenpoint Ave stop, depending on where you are in Greenpoint.