Is it a short sale? Do you owe more than the house is worth in today's market?
Let be proactive and call a HUD Approved Mortgage Counselor to get the facts straight and for them to answer the questions precisely.
You may qualify for a loan modification through your lender. With some lenders you DON'T have to be late to qualify.
You can list the property now if you have worries that you might be laid off.
The first comment that you received from "Sam" was incorrect. A deficiency Judgment is possible. A deficiency judgment may be awarded to the lender if the property is found by the court to have been abandoned for at least six (6) months before the decree of foreclosure. This is not the case if you reside in the home throughout the whole process.
Also taxes will be forgiven as the Mortgage Forgiveness Act helps homeowners.
Contact the counselor so you can create a plan for your family. Good Luck Chris and Take Care.