What should i do in my current situation as a first time homebuyer.?

Asked by Andrew, Saugus, MA Fri Aug 29, 2008

I recently bought a house with my girlfriend of two years. We were always happy and i truly thought we would grow old together until i picked up a second job to pay off some prior debt quicker. She claims the love is lost and doesn't feel we can work it out. So I told her that I expected her to leave as she was in a new relationship before i even found out she wanted to leave me. I put 10000 dollars down or 3% on the house and we cosigned the rest. We split all the bills and have three dogs. She can't go out and get and apartment with the dogs but that isn't my problem i told her. I feel bad that she would have to leave them with me because of that and that I would try to keep the house by having someone else move in such as my brother or a friend. She now says that she would like to live in the furnished basement but I don't see this being good. I need help. basically i think we need to be living apart How would i go about getting only my name put on the deed and mortgage?

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NonRealtor, , 23456
Fri Aug 29, 2008
Sell it. You both suffer the loss on the sale (if there is one, and my guess is there will be a loss) Then you both move on. Good Luck
2 votes
Andrew Adams, , 01915
Fri Aug 29, 2008
You need to refinance her off the loan, it is the only way. The catch is you need to be able to qualify.
2 votes
Andrew Adams, , 01915
Sat Aug 30, 2008

Based on that information I think your only option will be to sell the home. To qualify you will need a total debt ration around 41%. 50% would be less than $2,000/month. Income from your 2nd job will likely not be able to be included in yor income. To include 2nd job income you need to document a history 2 years of working 2 jobs. I know this is not what you want to hear, but it is your reality.
1 vote
Don Tepper, Agent, Burke, VA
Fri Aug 29, 2008
You're stuck between a rock and a hard place.

I agree that it wouldn't be a great idea for her to live in the furnished basement; you're right--you should be living apart.

On the other hand, the only way to get her off the mortgage is to refinance the property or to sell it. If you only bought in May, and with only 3% down, you're significantly upside down--you'd need to bring a lot of cash to closing.

It shouldn't be a problem getting her name off the deed, but that won't resolve the situation.

Are you able to handle the house payments on your own, or do you need her income as well?

Also, did you have any written agreement (let's say a pre-nup, with no nup) about how the house would be disposed of in an event like this? (I'm guessing not.)

If you need the additional income, consider renting the apartment or other areas of the house out, as you have already thought of doing.

Meanwhile, talk this over with a lawyer. There are a whole bunch of loose threads that have to be dealt with.

And, finally, don't be surprised if her new relationship falters and she tells you that she made a terrible mistake and that she wants you to take her back. That's your decision, of course, but be very, very, very cautious in that event. (Reading between the lines, my answer would be no.)

Good luck.
1 vote
Bill Eckler, Agent, Venice, FL
Fri Sep 5, 2008
We are truly sorry about your situation but trust...these things do work out. Our recommendation is to see an attorney about the legal issues and a counselor about the personal issues......but one thing is certain, we agree with your thought about being in seperate locations.

Good luck,
0 votes
Territory.c…, Agent, MA,
Tue Sep 2, 2008
Consult a lawyer immediately. Sounds like living together and attempting to prolong the situation may cause too much emotional harm to the both of you and who knows what else so you may want to try avoiding that at all costs. Would you ever consider selling the property, splitting your profits and giving yourselves the chance to simply start fresh? Perhaps you should have the property appraised to find out what the property is worth in this market ... If there is a high profit margin you may want to both consider selling and moving on. Just another option to throw in the mix :)

Good luck!
0 votes
Lori Lincoln, Agent, Dighton, MA
Sun Aug 31, 2008
In my experience you have some choices:
One would be to buy your girlfriends 1/2 of the house then refinance.
Two would be to keep things as they are.
Three- Sell the house and split the equity- if there is equity

The best thing I can tell you is to contact a good attorney.
Web Reference:  http://LoriLincolnTeam.com
0 votes
Irena, , Newton, MA
Sat Aug 30, 2008
Sorry for your troubles Andrew.
Since refinancing or a sale can set you back financially you could try different approach that can set you back emotionally. Make her an offer by letting her rent there for a year and in return she has to quit the deed. You could consult with the lawyer and ask if the tenancy at sufferance could apply to that possibility.
I do assume that you have bought the property as the tenant in common with your girlfriend, so all she has to do is quit the claim to the deed. Unfortunately that will not release her from the mortgage, and you will have to ask the mortgage company for the release.
A good lawyer can make the arrangements and draw appropriate paperwork.
Just a thought.
0 votes
Andrew, , Saugus, MA
Sat Aug 30, 2008
another question that i have in the effect we try to have her sign off on the mortgage roughly what would i have to bring to closing on a house that is valued at 305000? is there anyway to find out before i actually decide what i should do?? also to be qualified for the house do they do the same thing as the original purchase qualification where they looked at my credit history, score, and job status. I actually make roughly 1000 dollars more a month now with my second job. so i roughly take in 3500 to 3800 a month. if i were to pay the current mortgage rate on the price of the house it would be 2305 a month. leaving me anywhere from almost 1200 a month to 1500 a month for utilities and other debt
0 votes
Arlene Santa…, Agent, Andover, MA
Fri Aug 29, 2008
Before you do anything at all, consult with a real estate attorney. I would be happy to recommend several for you to interview. Once you've made some decisions with your attorney's guidance, meet with a Realtor that you trust. Good luck.
Arlene Santangelo
0 votes
Andrew, , Saugus, MA
Fri Aug 29, 2008
I asked my realtor because i also work with him at his primary job. He said I should contact the mortgage company to see what my current house is valued at and then talk to a lawyer. She had already said she would sign the papers. But if she doesn't what can i do? We have only been living in the new house since may. We haven't spent any money on upgrades except for my friend doing the chimney over which i paid for. Also I bought my home for 305000. If the value is more or less now then when i bought it does that also change?
0 votes
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