The distress of your situation can clearly be heard in the words you write.
Unfortunately your situation is not uncommon.
Many, 'want to sell' homeowners, have invested significant amounts in their home and made improvements so they could enjoy their time there better. Very rarely do these invests get reflected in the price a home can be sold for today. What determines the price at which you home will sell is what a buyer is willing to pay. What they will pay for your home depends on:
1. their purchase objectives (wholesale, flip, rent, long term hold, residence)
2. what purchase options they have (is their a better fit for their objectives down the street)
3. is the home perceived to be in the right value bracket. (wrong brackets results in absolute silence)
4. after repair value
Of course there are other factors. Real estate professionals work with buyer everyday. Real estate professionals are in home for sale ...everyday. We actually have an idea regarding what folks will buy, what they will buy and at what price.
The pros with which you are speaking are advising you what must be done to sell at the price you want. You do have another choice.
Be aware, real estate professionals do not sell homes. Home owners do! We, however can provide guidance in the many aspects of a home sale. Often the home owner ignores the advise. Other see the value and do all they can to make their home sellable. At this time your choices include proper pricing reflective of the condition. Homes that win the beauty contest sell faster and for more money. The other homes take a beating. It's not rocket science.
Do you want frank, honest, too the point, no nonsense direction (similar to the above) call a local real estate pro like myself and together create the strategy to get you home SOLD. 'As Is' is the qualifier is use for both high end and investor grade homes. However, 'As Is' is not remedy for a home that is overpriced.
There are over 20 ways to sell a home and 15 ways to finance a purchase. None of which is relevant if the price is not reflective of the value. To choose to defy what the data shows indicates other issues are in play. I trust you are able to work it out.