You are very frustrated! And, you are not alone. It is a tough market out there ... for Buyers, Sellers and Agents!
However, there is absolutely no reason for an agent, especially a Buyer's agent who is working with you, not to return your calls and Emails promptly. This is a major part of our job. A very big part!
There are many Listing Agents who specialize in Short Sales and Repos in today"s market. They are often extremely hard to communicate with ... because they may be fielding 15-20 offers (or more) on a good property. And, they may have ten listings or more. As an agent, I can say that I have been so frustrated with attempts to communicate ... I could spit nails. Sometimes, you have to actually go to their office and try and find them in person! You don't say if you have been dealing directly with the Listing agents on SS or Repo properties. Don't get me wrong ... some of them are very good and easy to reach.
More and more regular Equity sales (owned by a human being with enough equity to pay off his loans and closing costs) are coming on in Anaheim Hills. These are by far the easiest type of sale to deal with from the standpoint of both Buyer and Buyer's Agent!
I don't know enough about the situation concerning your Back-Up offer to venture an opinion, really. How many other Back-Up offers were ahead of you? Usually when a property falls out of escrow, the Back-Up offer in second position falls into place ... and so on down the line. There are many factors that could apply here.
You don't say what price range you are looking at. It is much more difficult to get a contract together, these days, in the $500,000's and under. There are many multiple offers and many homes go for over list price. I presume you are fully qualified with your loan and are willing to make an offer over list price if the comps support it?
I have been a Realtor in Anaheim Hills since 1982. I can say, without reservation, that the vast majority of RE Agents are extremely concientious and work very hard for their clients.
Go to the Home Page of my website at http://www.marleneprescott.com
and click on Anaheim Hills Real Estate.
I just finished my latest Market Conditions report a couple of days ago. You will find a lot of very good, specific and accurate information about the current Anaheim Hills market!
Good Luck ... and hang in there!
Prudential California Realty
CA DRE Lic# 00840097