I would advise that you contact an attorney. I have the name of an attorney who works out of the Bronx and is very good. Her name is Denise Miranda and she would be able to help you. Please find the link to her website below:
Keller Williams Realty Group
The reason I ask your age is, if you can afford the taxes only on your income, perhaps you could get a reverse mortgage to pay off the loan, and you could stay in the house without having to make mortgage payments. You would be responsible for taxes, insurance, and other upkeep. You could possibly also get an enhanced STAR exemption to lower your taxes, and there might be other methods of getting the taxes lowered for you as well.
If you would like to discuss the idea of a reverse mortgage with me, please feel free to call: 516-972-1687.
My condolences on the loss of your husband. It is always difficult to deal with the emotional side of a death, but unfortunately, life goes on for the living. If you haven't already, you definitely need to speak with an attorney familiar with NY probate laws to get advice on how to best proceed or investigate the laws through your local jurisdiction responsible for dealing with probate. If you know someone that has gone through this process themselves or are a do it yourself type person, it is something that can been done without an attorney depending on the size of the estate.
You don't list any time frame, but the first thing that needs to happen is to deal with the probate or settle the estate and know the ownership in regards to the property. Depending on how you were in title on the property you may be able to immediately assume 100% ownership or have to go through the process of obtaining the 100% interest subject to the lien on the property by the mortgage company. Either way you should be able to sell the property to protect your interest depending on the value of the home and the amount of the mortgage.
Basically there isn't a simple answer to your question without knowing more details and being familiar with the laws of NY and these must be answered by someone that is knowledgeable to your specific area.
Best wishes to you as you move forward in 2010.