You raised one of the most important points about choosing a lender when you stated, "this lender was listed on the CAFHA 's website list of approve lenders who are supposed to be familiar with this type of loan/assistance programs etc. That is how I found them."
The best way to get a good provider, whether it's a Realtor, Escrow or Title officer, or lender, is by a trusted recommendation. Many websites offer "pay to play" recommendations, and although a lender may be advertising, there may be no one overseeing the quality of the recommended agents.
If your loan agent isn't serving you, it's time to move on. Every buyer deserves outstanding service.
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