My question for you would be do you have a plan? Often we operate without a conscious plan and the cart ends up pulling the horse !
Purchase two small notebooks, one for you and one for your wife. Commit to each other to write down all monies that are spent for one month. Then sit down and look at it together. This will show you where your money is going AND help you see if you can rechannel this spending to speed up your progress.
Next I woud suggest sitting down with a lender to see where your debt needs to be in order to purchase. This identifies the goal.
As a fellow agent of Edward Korthals, I like his advice of getting yourselves in a position where you have a solid foundation of monies in savings. Sometimes this can be accomplished by purchasing at a lower price point while interest rates are at all time lows AND committing to saving along the way. Homeownership definately has unforseen expenses that come with it.
What does your schedule look like I'd love to sit down with you and your wife and talk through some options. Best regards Deborah