Christopher Columbus had completely wrong maps, too. And look at what he accomplished! (Though initially he thought he'd ended up in India . . . thus the naming of the native Americans "Indians." But that's a different story.)
Probably, the buyer doesn't have a breakdown of specific charges they are asking the seller to pay. In my experience, it goes something like this:
The buyer's agent prepares an estimate of closing costs prior to crafting an offer.
Buyer: "Wow, we didn't expect the closing costs to be so expensive. That's really going to pinch us in the bank account after settlement.
Buyer's Agent: "Well, maybe we can ask the seller to help pay for some or all of your closing costs. We'll ask for a seller assist which is usually a percentage of the purchase price and that way your costs are taken from the seller's proceeds."
Buyer: "Okay, I hope they'll agree"
The buyer doesn't typically ask for specific line items to be compensated. Seller's assists are usually a percentage of the bottom line.
All charges to the buyer and seller are disclosed on the HUD-1 at settlement. I can't think of why the buyer's estimate of closing costs should be kept secret from the seller but if the seller insists on seeing it and the buyer refuses, the seller;s agent can easily create an estimate of buyer's closing costs that will probably be pretty close.
To Robin Silverberg's point and also in my experience, most sellers are primarily concerned and negotiate for the "net proceeds to seller". Usually the details of the buyers side on the buyers side of the HUD-1 are inconsequential.
Good Luck. I hope that helps.
RE/Max Professional Realty Inc.
Exton, PA 19341
(610) 363-8444... more