Question Details

Susan, Both Buyer and Seller in Maryland

why are realtors so rude?

Asked by Susan, Maryland Thu Oct 11, 2007

Help the community by answering this question:


Hi Susan. I am not sure that REALTORS are any ruder than other people. I have unfortunately encountered rudness in all kinds of professions. Rude doctors, rude lawyers, rude teachers, rude cashiers. I have also encountered very courteous and professional behavior in every imaginable life situation. I also have encountered rude and nice clients. Rudeness seems to go both ways. Personally, I try not to react to rude people. I'd rather kill them with kindness than lower myself to their level. You ought to try it some time. Rude people usually don't know what to do when you are extremely friendly to them.
Web Reference:
3 votes Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007
Ute Ferdig -…, Real Estate Pro in New Castle, DE
Was it Me?

I ask tough questions, that may seem rude. It really depends how and when they are asked.

1.What type of Home are you looking for?
2. When do you plan on buying
3. Do you have a pre-approval letter from your Loan officer.
4. Are you working with a Realtor? ( I really don`t ask that one, I just threw it in)

I call it the 20 minute, 20 day rule.
I would rather find out if I have a valid buyer in 20 minutes, Instead of 20 days.
Time is money, I have three Children to care for. I can not afford to spend my time on someone who just wants to look, for two or three years.

Which brings me to my own theory of why so many Realtors fail and go out of business.
It is my opinion that they do not ask the tough question in the beginning, because they do not want to seem rude. They would rather wait, become friends, drive around town together, Look at houses.
For 20 days. Only to find out that they didn`t have a buyer.

I am working on my driving.
2 votes Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007
Mr.P, Other/Just Looking in Arizona
Hi Susan.

Doctors are rude.
Teachers are rude.
Lawyers are rude.
Policemen are rude.
Politicians are rude.
Teenagers are rude.
Customers are rude.
Mechanics are rude.
Flight attendants are rude.
Bartenders are rude.
Insurance agents are rude.
Stock brokers are rude.
Professors are rude.
Sales clerks are rude.
Hair stylists are rude.
Blackjack dealers are rude.
Cashiers are rude.
Bank tellers are rude.
Mortgage brokers are rude.

We are all human. You never know what someone is going through in their lives at the exact moment you feel they're being rude to you.

Take the high road and ignore rude comments. If they continue, find someone else to work with, simple.


Scott Miller, Realty Associates, Boca Raton, FL
1 vote Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 7, 2010
I'm considered to be blunt, but then, I'm a New Yorker. My buyers and sellers are both happy to have someone be frank with them, though.
1 vote Thank Flag Link Sun Oct 14, 2007

Sorry to hear that you had a bad experience....or more than one? I noticed the plural use of the word "Realtors" in your response.

I am curious about the story behind your post, and I do hope that you come back in fill in the details.

I have heard stories and complaints about both new and experienced agents. I have also heard many compliments and warm-hearted stories of appreciation in this industry. As a Realtor, I must work with any and all Realtors on the other side of a transaction, since we are bringing buyers and sellers together. I have had the pleasure of working with many, and gritted my teeth or counted to 10 a few times while working with others.

This industry, like others, reflects society and that brings us personalities and temperaments across the board.
1 vote Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007
Deborah Madey, Real Estate Pro in Brick, NJ
Hi Susan,

I'm not sure you mean to generalize and assume you are talking about a specific Realtor with whom you had a bad encounter? Because, yes, there sure are some of them out there.

It may be time for some of them to hang their hats. Burn out is pretty common in this profession, especially when you have to deal with:

Buyers with whom you spend hours upon hours showing them homes, setting up appointments and advising, and then they disappear into thin air with no explanation.

Sellers who blame you for everything that goes wrong, even when it's beyond your control.

Working months and months - for free.

People like this, who generally loathe real estate agents and have nothing but venom to spew about our intentions (see, specifically, Baldurr's response):…

Hear that enough and it starts to get to you, ya know?

Oh, I could go on about what contributes to general burnout in this industry, but you're right: that's no reason to be rude to consumers.

So, please accept my apologies on behalf of the one (or, god forbid, the few, the many??) that were rude to you. Whenever I'm feeling a little burned out, undervalued, overworked, and generally unappreciated, I do my best to keep it in check. I doesn't always work, and for that, I am sorry.
1 vote Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007

I agree with most of what has been said. Caring, knowledgeable Realtors said it.

One (of the may) of the things that cause clients to feel rudeness by realtors is the lack of Realtors actively listening. Listening is such a large part of communication yet so many lack the skills to perform it well. Think about it. If the realtor really understood you they might not have been perceived as rude.

Just a thought…
1 vote Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007
Sounds like you have some unloading to do. Go ahead and get it off of your chest. It will make you feel a lot better. Tell us what the story is! There are a lot of rude people. Please tell us more. We would like to be able to relate to your story. Carrie
1 vote Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007
Susan, I am sorry you had a bad experience with a Realtor. I'd love to hear more about what happened. There are indeed rude agents out there, but I feel the majority of us Realtors, just as all human beings, are kind and curteous. I wish you luck in your future real estate experiences.
Web Reference:
1 vote Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007
The Hagley G…, Real Estate Pro in Pleasanton, CA
I've dealt with rude people in every profession but none as consistently as Realtors, they are the most demanding, fake people I have ever had the displeasure of dealing with. They are the scum of the Earth feeding off of other people.
0 votes Thank Flag Link Thu Sep 10, 2015
I am a San Diego Realtor and San Diego Realtors are not rude, they are down right nasty! It is enough to make me quit the industry but I enjoy the transaction, it's the people I can't stand. I believe it stems from incompetence. 9 out of 10 Realtors are worthless so they cop an attitude to throw you off their trail. Also the insidious behavior is derived from the perception of being a "good negotiator." Television has taught us to be good you need to be tough, a bulldog, a shark. But the truth of the matter you don't need to be a bully to be a good negotiator. Negotiation is a dance and takes finesse. You can't finesse your opponent with brute force and that only comes with experience ergo my first point.
0 votes Thank Flag Link Mon Dec 30, 2013
Susan -

Don't paint us all with a broad brush!

There are rude people in this world -I am sure some of them are Realtors.

There are also very professional neighbors and local experts that would love to assist you in buying or selling real estate in your area.

I have been in the industry 28 years in Maryland. If you need help locally - or want a referral to a "NICE" agent in your neighborhood - please let me know!

Good luck!

Gerry Dunn
Associate Broker

Serving Maryland, Virginia and Washington, D.C. for 28 years
0 votes Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 7, 2010
Why do people ask vague general questions?
0 votes Thank Flag Link Wed Oct 6, 2010
A realtor doesnt have to be to rude to be honest and forthright with a client or customer. I find a lot of rude realtors and they give us all a bad image with the public. If they want to be rude i suggest they find another line of work and stop having a negative impact on people like me who are not in real estate just to make money but want to help people find the home of their dreams. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
0 votes Thank Flag Link Wed Oct 6, 2010
Some are nice. Some are not so nice. Some are nice sometimes and not so nice other times. Depends on the person, the day and the weather. They're only human!
0 votes Thank Flag Link Wed Oct 6, 2010
Rudeness is in the eye of the beholder, what one person deems as rude, another does not.

If you live in the South,, you think the boldness of people up North are rude - yet the Northern people think it is common.

I personally think that what people confuse rudeness with is lack of communication, or sometimes the way you say things or the way they are taken. If you've had an experience where you thought someone was rude to you, then do what you would do in any situation with a Dr. - atty - CPA, etc........go get someone that you communicate with on a better level.
0 votes Thank Flag Link Sun Oct 14, 2007
On behalf of all the dedicated, hard working and true professional Realtors out there I apologize for whatever rudeness you experienced. Actually, my encounters with several rude and extremely lazy Realtors whom could not even return e-mails and phone calls is actually what got me into this business. I thought to myself... heck.. if there are that many snobby or just plain rude agents out there, then that means there is a HUGE market for people that actually deserve and desire to be treated w/ prompt service and the utmost respect. Turns out I was right!

Hope you find a MUCH better Realtor that will knock your socks off with service! Not to say other brokers are not capable of providing top notch service, but wherever you may be; you may want to seek a Realtor from Keller Williams. I know that our culture and ethics here in San Antonio, TX is what has made us #1 in the area!
Web Reference:
0 votes Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007
Yes, Susan, I will be interested in knowing your story also; especially since you used the plural realtor's'.

It is always our goal to be professional and continue to improve Realtor's image, so knowing what the realtor(s) did to offend you will surely help us improve next time.

Look forward to hear from you.

0 votes Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007
Sylvia Barry,…, Real Estate Pro in Marin, CA
Because alot of them are not true issue in many professions, but many people do not have the experience nor correct training to deal with the public, (or anyone else for that matter).

Do not take that experience though as all eliminate those that lack the professionalism, many franchises have extensive training, and the state boards continue to impose strict guidelines so people like yourself have a better experience with the rest of us.

On a daily basis I come across folks like you, which makes the rest of us work that much please just don't take the Realtors you have come across as rude..some personalities a license cannot change...however many of us who do it for a living long term will treat you right.
Web Reference:
0 votes Thank Flag Link Thu Oct 11, 2007
Search Advice
Ask our community a question
Email me when…

Learn more

Copyright © 2016 Trulia, Inc. All rights reserved.   |  
Have a question? Visit our Help Center to find the answer