Ask a few consumers who have completed transactions in the past. especially if he can give you the names of clients he has served as buyers agent. How did they feel at the END of the transaction after they moved in.
Were they happy to have an working for them who wanted to tightly control the details of the search and the transaction?
My clients have always been happiest when I paid close attention to the details, including conducting property inquires.
You might contrast that with the answers from clients of a laid back, easy going agent who let things just take their course, conme what may. - Not that there is anything wrong with being easy going, as long as the easy goer is paying full attention to what goes on.
E-mail him with a link to this question, that is a sure way to let him know what your concerns are. I expect that he can give you a good explanation of why he (and most buyers agents) want to follow the custom of buyers agent contacts listing agent.
At this point you and the agent have to reconcile the doubts you have somehow, in order to proceed with a successful search, offer, negotiation, transaction, through to a closed escrow.
The listing agent is only unethical if you declare that you are represented and then the listing agent tries to, or attempts to steal you away from your representative. This is very rare, but it has been known to happen. - Thus the prohibition against stealing clients or trying to steal clients.
The listing agent is ethical to give you publicly available information about the property such as the list price, the features, disclosure of defects, and tell you how your agent can submit an offer (facsimile, email etc.) He can also tell you what a great neighborhood it is in and say anything else truthful in service to his client the seller.
The arrogance of bank asset managers is amazing. The bank listing agents are simply following their marching orders, the banks don't care that some buyer is anxious to know the status of an offer.They are on their own timetable, they expect buyers to wait days on end for a resonse, but then expect buyers to accept bank counter offers (when they finaly come) within hours. If anything, they will use the knowledge that you are persistent and want a particular property to extract a higher price and worse terms against you.
Having said all that. A Realtor needs to gain the confidence of their client. If you have made your concerns clear to him as you have made here, he should be able to explain what he is doing on your behalf to your satisfaction, or be prepared to set you free. - Unless you have contractual obligations with him. or for properties that he has already introduced to you, negotiated on or submitted an offfer regarding.
To paraphrase what silent J said, if you cannot get a release from the agent or satisfactory reconciliation, you will need to look over your contract with him carefully.
First, I'd suggest bringing up your frustration with your agent. This person will get a large chunk of change if you close on a place, regardless if he helps or not, so, at least, give him a solid prod before moving any further forward with your house search!
If your agent doesn't respond well, find another! I can't speak to the local laws about this, but I assume you can terminate the relationship. Check whatever contract you signed -- you may have to wait for it to expire before changing agents.
Working with an agent that you like is really the best way to ensure that you enjoy the experience.
EXAMPLE: I had a client Doctor, called agent stated he was Dr. XYZ he killed my ability to work reduction of list price listing agent stated me, he contacted her "he is a Doctor has lots of money... he can pay full price if he wants the property"....
Only a few examples. Realtors are professionals best allow us do our jobs represent you