There are some "unwritten rules of etiquette" in the real estate world and it would be beneficial for your agent to share those with you. It is common practice for your Realtor to make appointments for you and show you properties. If you make appointments with other agents and see properties without your Realtor, there's an assumption that you are not working with anyone, and at the time of submitting an offer, it would not be right to then involve your Realtor.
I personally solve that problem by asking anyone that calls us if they are working with an agent, but not everyone does that.
Technically, if you don't have an agreement signed, you don't owe anything to the first agent, but you will be burning bridges and at the time of negotiating, it may become uncomfortable.
The best option is for you to choose an agent and stay loyal to them and ask them to do all the due diligence, including setting up appointments and showing you properties.
It is natural for your agent to feel uncomfortable with the situation you've described, as if you were to want to buy that property, it could lead to a commission dispute between your realtor and the listing agent.
But, in order to avoid any future disputes, you might just call your agent before making any appointments.
There is nothing wrong with looking at a property with the Listing Agent as long you let them know
that you already have a Realtor. On the other hand if there is no agreement written and signed between you and your Realtor than she should not be upset, unless you have an agreement in writing and signed nobody can force anything on you. At least you were honest enough to tell your Realtor, there are people who go around looking at properties with several agents and none of them know.
All the best,
On the other hand, if you want to be -- then by all means, you are free to do so.
Best of luck,
It would be too lengthy of a response to explain "Procuring Cause" here. Just seeing the house with another agent does not necessarily make that agent the procuring cause (and receiver of the commission) but it is a part of it. These are the things that as professionals, we don't want the customers to know. We try to work these issues out behind the scenes, so we don't look unprofessional. But at the same time, as your question indicates, when the client doesn't fully understand the process, it just causes a lot of confusion.
I'm sorry you had to get caught in the middle of this, but I'm happy to see some education come, that hopefully other consumers will learn as they read this question and these comments.
You are not forced to use the listing agent to write the contract you can have whoever you want write the contract and it's up to the brokers (and possibly and arbitration committee) to work out what's right on the commission.
As I understand your situation, you have a contract with an agent to sell your property. That's it. You have no obligation requiring you to have to purchase a separate property through that same agent. Your current agent is getting a commission on the sale of your property. It appears to me that she also wants the commission on the purchase of your next property and bacame indignant that she might not get it. I see no reason for that behavior. Drop her, if you want, and do business with whom you want and who will treat you respectfully.