I was able to set their interest rate at 4.125% and pay 10k of their closing costs.
I can do that for you, as well.
You should request your Realtor to provide you with estimated Buyer's Costs. In addition, your lender should have given you estimated costs for the loan. If not, demand this from your lender.
As you can see from my comments above, there are many factors that will determine how much you will need. You, as a consumer, need to look at all costs and if you do not understand or are confused about some of those costs, ask questions. There is no such thing as a stupid question. This is a major investment. If your lender or Realtor do not answer the questions or brush off your concerns, then you need a new lender or a Realtor. Both your Realtor and your lender should be sitting down with you and explaining these for you.
Usually VA is zero down and the 3% up front cost may be built into the loan. You need your VA Certificate of Eligability. If the home has issue which need repair you should have funds for that as in today's market the seller is most often passing that over to the Buyer. Also, plan on about $1000 for inspections. It could be less, but a good number.