Not all loan officers are the same, and if you spoke to one of the big banks, I can assure you this was not the right lender to approach.
You should approach a Credit Union or a small local bank or mortgage broker and I suspect you'll get a better reception.
However, why not try to consult with another loan officer? If you can't get a loan now, at least he can point you to the right direction towards home ownership.
Best of Luck.